Hey there and happy Sunday to all. Have you ever wondered how some people go through a lot of crap but always land back on their feet again and then others go through crap and just seem to self -destruct? Well, that my friend is no accident. I am not sure where that extra push comes from that makes you want to run through the fire and allow the wind to put out the flames, but some say it’s from the way you were raised, some say its adrenaline, some say it’s God. All I know is that there’s a fighter in each and every one of us, but we have a choice. To either look problems and tragedies in the eye and crumble or look problems and tragedies in the eye and laugh because no matter how hard it hits you, there is no escape.

I have often felt like my life was cursed in some way. And every time I have been knocked down by life, I get up and then something else comes along and knocks me right back down again. My butt is pretty sore lol, but I keep getting up anyway knowing and expecting to be knocked back down. I know from experience that if I expect it, it’s not as big of a shock. Nor does it hurt my butt as much. Every punch gets softer and lighter and eventually, you won’t even feel the pain anymore. You’ll be like “Oh…I got hurt? Didn’t know lol.” And yeah, you’ll laugh it off because you knew it was coming. It helps to be a little psychic too which I am. But I’ve never been able to control that. I just know it when it’s working to my advantage.

I have known people who think that I am just too negative all the time because I expect bad things to happen. But I don’t call it being negative, I call it being aware. There’s a lot of people walking around like nothing ever hurts them or nothing bad will happen to them and you’ll know them when you see their confidence beaming like the evening sun. But it’s all fake as hell. Let’s face it, bad shit happens; and we have to be prepared for it. Why? So, we don’t turn to drugs and alcohol to kill the pain, so we don’t lose our minds and start seeing things that aren’t there and talking to invisible creatures that we think are after us in the dark. Some people are more fragile than others and cannot handle when bad things happen to them. That’s why mental health is such a big issue nowadays.

I personally am against using drugs that are going to mess with my mind in any way. I just don’t trust it. A lot of people have found that antidepressants and medication for anxiety have caused mentally ill people to become murderous, or suicidal. So, you really need to question and research the medication the doctor prescribes for you. Why are so many people killing their loved ones for no apparent reason? Mental illness. Why are so many people committing mass shootings in public places? Mental illness. Why are people doing reckless thing that they know can kill them? Mental illness. I don’t know if any of these people are on anti-depressants or not, but studies show that some of them are.

I believe in taking the natural approach to making yourself feel better. It’s not an easy fix and yes you will have to work harder without medication, but you can do it. If you’re strong enough. There are also people who are lucky enough to be able to handle pressure and stress, grief and pain without doing anything but enduring it. Those kinds of people are the strongest of the strong and are very hard to destroy in any way. My last two ex-boyfriends were like that and they have no idea how much I looked up to them and admired that about them. That is the kind of person I am striving to be. And I use a lot of self-talk, spiritual reading and faith in God every day to keep my mind from imploding. I have to. I understand that everyone can’t do what I do. It’s hard but it’s a fight that you can win if you try. Some battles never have an ending and with mental health, it’s for life. But until you learn how to put the bad feelings in a box and lock it away in a corner of your mind and never let the monsters out…you will never truly be free.

I love life so much and can’t even imagine not being in this beautiful place called earth anymore. And I know that if I want to achieve my goals in this life, I have to be able to allow myself to get knocked down and not only get back up but stay up. I long for the day when I can be strong enough to take down every single bad thing that comes after me to try and destroy me. But I’m just not there yet but you know what? One day I will be as long as I keep getting back up. My goals for success are mine and no one can take them away unless I let them. And that is something that I will never give in to.

Until next time…